This year has been a year of changes, and you know how difficult change is for kids on the spectrum.
For the younger kids, social stories can be a great way to get them ready for change well in advance of it actually happening. I'm ever so grateful that I found out about them and was able to use them effectively with Dylan when he was little.
But now that he's older and has had the benefit of formal written and illustrated social stories over the years, when I want to introduce something new to him, I say to him, "OK, Dylan, it's time for a story." He'll usually say, "OK, mom, what is it." It's almost as if this part of the story is scripted, and by now, it's almost a joke between the two of us.
Our conversation this afternoon started out just like that, joke and all. Dylan's habilitation provider he's had for almost five years resigned last week. I had to break the news to Dylan. It's been a real 'hand-wringer' to try to figure out just how I could do it and at the same time minimize his angst. By this afternoon, I had to tell him.
We had an interview with a new provider set up for 4:30pm, so time was of the essence. This is how it went:
MOM: OK, Dylan, it's time for a story.
DYLAN: OK, Mom, what is it?
MOM: So, when we get home, we're going to meet a new friend for you.
DYLAN: But mom, I miss Patrick.
MOM: Yes, I know you miss Patrick, but he's coming to see you on Thursday. We're going to meet Tyler. Tyler will be able to come see you on the days that Patrick has other stuff to do.
DYLAN: Oh, mom. (rubs his head) I miss Patrick.
MOM: I know, but you need another friend, and Tyler is really nice.
This got us over the hump, and Dylan was receptive to talking to Tyler when we got home. The interview went well, and after it was over, Dylan told me that he thought Tyler was OK.
Honestly, I was feeling kind of guilty for not telling Dylan that Patrick resigned, but then I got to thinking that we might actually see Patrick, on occasion, so it wasn't like he was gone for good. Hopefully, this will make the transition easier for everyone involved.
This is a point that service providers, especially in cases where they've been with clients for a very long time, might take note: if you're thinking of making a change, be kind to your clients (and yourself) and ease out of it. Transition with the person who will be taking your place.
A big thanks to Patrick whose been a big part of our family for the past five years. Dylan couldn't have a better friend.
